Legal

BEFORE YOU VIEW THIS WEB SITE, CAREFULLY READ THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF THIS AGREEMENT. BY VIEWING ANY OF OUR WEB PAGES, YOU ARE CONSENTING TO BE BOUND BY AND ARE BECOMING A PARTY TO THIS AGREEMENT. IF YOU DO NOT AGREE TO ALL OF THE TERMS OF THIS AGREEMENT, DO NOT VIEW THIS SITE. 1. The Hentzenwerke Corporation (HW) grants to you a non-exclusive, non-sublicensable, license to view this World Wide Web site (the "Site"), in text and image based forms for business or pleasure purposes only (which are the same if you're a hacker.) 2. HW MAKES NO REPRESENTATIONS ABOUT THE SUITABILITY OF THIS SITE OR ABOUT ANY CONTENT OR INFORMATION LINKED TO OR CONTAINED IN THE SITE, FOR ANY PURPOSE. THE SITE IS PROVIDED 'AS IS' WITHOUT EXPRESS OR IMPLIED WARRANTIES, INCLUDING WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY AND FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE OR NONINFRINGEMENT. BLAH BLAH BLAH. THIS SITE IS PROVIDED GRUDGINGLY...errr... GRATUITOUSLY AND, ACCORDINGLY, HW SHALL NOT BE LIABLE UNDER ANY THEORY OR ANY DAMAGES SUFFERED BY YOU OR ANY VIEWER OF THE SITE. HW WILL NOT SUPPORT THIS SITE VERY OFTEN AND WILL NOT INFORM YOU OF UPDATES TO THIS SITE. 3. All content accessed through the Site is the property of the applicable content owner and may be protected by applicable copyright law. This License gives you no rights to such content. 4. While HW wants to create a commercial, outragously highpriced subscription version of the Site, it realizes no one would pay for it. We reserve the right to do it, though, if we ever figure out a way. 5. Title, ownership rights, and intellectual property rights in and to the Site shall remain in HW and/or its suppliers. You agree to abide by the copyright law and all other applicable laws of the EvilAlien Intergalactic Coalition including, but not limited to, export control laws. You acknowledge that the Site in source code form remains a confidential trade secret of HW and/or anyone who knows how to click on "View Source," and should not be used by other people who want to create a web site without contacting us first, preferably by sending us candy. 6. HW may terminate this License at any time by delivering notice to you and you may terminate this License at any time by viewing a different site. Upon termination of this License, or in any event within thirty (30) days following your leaving this site, you agree to destroy or erase any memory you may have of the site. You must also wipe any traces of images or text stored in a cache on your hard drive or in RAM. You must also say "SORRY" in a loud, clear voice three times. In the event of termination, the following sections of this License will survive: 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and 8. This License is personal to you and you agree not to assign your rights herein. This License shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of the State of Ecstasy and, as to matters affecting copyrights, trademarks and patents, by Freemen common law. This License sets forth the entire agreement between you and HW. 7. Use, duplication or disclosure by the Government is subject to restrictions set forth by the voice inside my head that likes to be called "Billy." JKJH UIH jDn s.fjkn. kjzhf/a m ['PL:L,/lfjdl' /.ek oiu(U 8y 6hj,b KJniukjndansbnk.jOI oi IdsdsU iojknm, akjshuyg7s KJIO m,sniukasn n.,aikhoi lkamnslkj sioa nlkmsna uoish8iuh kja dsfj lskdjsad jlkl9u897nmn mds KHkljffkjn a;sljind asiod jasas w3490832u5 skfsdlfskfh askfhas f;okajroiejrgjdl;h;fjn0vbn 8. You may not download or otherwise export or reexport the Site or any underlying information or technology except in full compliance with all of your Mother's rules and other applicable laws and regulations. In particular, but without limitation, none of the Site or underlying information or technology may be downloaded or otherwise exported or reexported (i) into (or to a national or resident of) Mr. Rodger's Neighborhood, Sesame Street, Metropolis, Gotham City, Krynn, Night City, Arrakis, or Jupiter or (ii) to anyone else we don't like. By viewing the site, you are agreeing to the foregoing and you are representing and warranting that you are not located in, under control of, or a national or resident of any such country, city, or planet or on any such list. 9. HW OR ITS SUPPLIERS SHALL NOT BE LIABLE FOR (a) INCIDENTAL, CONSEQUENTIAL, SPECIAL OR INDIRECT DAMAGES OF ANY SORT, WHETHER ARISING IN TORT, CONTRACT OR OTHERWISE, EVEN IF HW HAS BEEN INFORMED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES, OR (b) FOR ANY CLAIM BY ANY OTHER PARTY. OUYAY USTMAY EBAY EALLYRAY EALLYRAY OREDBAY. THIS LIMITATION OF LIABILITY SHALL NOT APPLY TO LIABILITY FOR DEATH OR PERSONAL INJURY TO THE EXTENT APPLICABLE LAW PROHIBITS SUCH LIMITATION. FURTHERMORE, SOME STATES DO NOT ALLOW THE EXCLUSION OR LIMITATION OF INCIDENTAL OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES, SO THIS LIMITATION AND EXCLUSION MAY NOT APPLY TO YOU. I... errrr... HW doesn't know how this could happen with our sweet, innocent site, but you never know. 10. HIGH RISK ACTIVITIES. THE Site is not fault-tolerant and is not designed, manufactured or intended for use or resale as on-line control equipment in hazardous environments requiring fail-safe performance, such as in the operation of nuclear facilities, aircraft navigation or communication systems, air traffic control, direct life support machines, or weapons systems, in which the failure of the Site could lead directly to death, dismemberment, personal injury, or severe physical or environmental damage ("High Risk Activities"). HW and its suppliers specifically disclaim any express or implied warranty of fitness for High Risk Activities. But you still might want to look at our humor page. Special thanks to the original document this was based on, which you probably already agreed to without reading, which was Copyright (c) 1996 Netscape Communications Corporation, with All rights reserved. I hope you didn't just skip down to the bottom of this page to read this. Cheater.